Summer 2009
July 27, 2009
The Summer season for the Tilly family is officially over with the exception of 1 more weekend booking for Andy in West Virgina in a few weeks. But the mad rush is done. For most people, summertime is about vacations, relaxing by the pool, doing fun things while the kids are out of school. For us the months of May through August are a blur. All that stays in the fridge is a case of Coke for Andy and Caffine Free Diet Coke for me, a few miscellaneous things like some cheese and fruit for Bella, take-out and pizza boxes from the “dinners” during a week when Andy is on the road and we were at home and maybe some 2 week old leftover meal that I cooked for him on a night when he was coming back home for a few days. I always realize how dirty the shelves of my refrigerator are during summertime since they sit naked for months at a time. Another thing I realize during the summer is that I seem to put on about 10 pounds due to the fact that we eat like crap. Another staple of summer in the Tilly house is the never-ending laundry tornado that every 4 or 5 days blows through the house. The suitcases stay out in the bedroom only to be emptied and then packed up once again in a matter of a day or two. It struck me that we have some pretty good luggage with all that we have put it through. Not only do they survive summer after summer, we have hauled them from Thailand, to Costa Rica, to Mexico and all around Italy. Good luggage is important in this house.
This summer in particular I ended up being gone actually more than Andy was which was strange. It started with the Kuykendall Family Vacation the first part of June, Andy was then on to Crosstimbers/Westmoore summer camp for a week, next Andy had CT Kids Live for a week, then Falls Creek which was amazing and will have its own blog entry, next he was off to a booking in Northeastern Oklahoma for a week, then back here for a day before he flew off to Knoxville, TN for CHIC 2009 which I was thrilled to meet up with him just a day behind. Andy headed back to work at CT on the following Monday, however Bella and I were already up in Oklahoma by that time for a 7 day stay for swimming lessons and turns out a last minute catering job at my cousin’s wedding for 200+ people. The following Saturday we were headed home and now have been here for 48 hrs. I must say I am absolutely beyond worn out. I mean not like I am tired from a lack of sleep, but I am emotionally and spiritually exhausted. And I know that how I feel is nothing compared to Andy. That man is so amazing. It always makes me laugh inside when people think that when he has been out of the office for the summer means that he should come back rested from his “time off”. Let me tell you folks, its not time off. It is the hardest, most exhausting season of our entire year. But I gotta say, as tired as we are when its all over, we wouldn’t trade it for anything. It’s what we do.
It was a great summer this year. I think we are both still processing all that God did. We also released our 3rd book to publish titled Poser. Man, I have to say I am pretty proud of that book. Already it is changing lives of students across the country. It was a lot of work to get that thing done, but it was worth it. My husband the author…love it.
All in all, life is good. We are home. But before you start feeling too bad for us and how hard we have worked for the last 3 months and the fact that I have spent very few nights in my own bed since May 29th, I do need to add that this time next week I will be sipping a beverage of my choice by one of many amazing pools at the top rated hotel in the country, The Wynn Encore with my awesome husband. That’s right folks, we are headed to Vegas for a week of absolutely nothing. And yes, I am leaving the suitcases out until then.
Let the Craziness Resume
July 12, 2009
Well, I am back. I know it has been since March that I updated this poor neglected little website that chronicles the ins and outs and ups and downs of our little family.
It’s been since March. Again, I know.
However, not to dwell too much on how long it has been. Now it’s time to get caught up on the last few months! I am leaving tomorrow for our last full week of the Summer Camp 2009 season. It has been an amazing time. I will be blogging from the road and I can’t wait to get all that has happened out of my head and into words.
Once again, here we go.
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Wow.
March 14, 2009
So today Bella and I came to my parent’s house to relax for a few days while Andy is on a ski trip in Colorado. When the grandkids are at Beba and Poppa’s house, the toy basket in the corner is like a treasure chest full of old and new things that Beba is so good at keeping around. Bella’s first toy of choice today was a small purse that was probably my Mom’s 30 years ago. Inside was a tiny wallet that Beba made back in the day when she had her very busy Homespun Memories business that created clothing, purses and lots of house hold decorations and toured the craft show circut for years. That Mother of mine is quite creative I tell ya!
So in the wallet were 2 pictures and a business card. One picture was of Caleb and Robbie the night of their engagement party, sitting on my parent’s fireplace at our home back in Edmond, Oklahoma. The other picture was my senior picture…here is what happened.
Bella: Mom, dat one is Uncle Bubba and Wobbie.
Me: Yep.
Bella: But Momma, who is in dis one?
Me: Bella, who do you think that is?
Bella: Me?
Me: Nope.
Bella: Mimi?
Me: Nope.
Bella: Um….one of you fwiends?
Me: No Baby…That’s me. That’s your Momma.
She Pauses…Then looks at me with a questioning look on her face…
Bella: Oh, You mean when you were somebody else?
Awesome.
The Big Man Upstairs
March 10, 2009
I was making our bed after getting home from picking Bella up from school today. Here was our conversation…
Bella: Momma, when I get scayed (scared) I can just call Jesus.
Me: Yes Bella, you can call Jesus. Did you learn that at school today?
Bella: Yes I did. An you know what else I luned (learned) Momma?
Me: What baby?
Bella: I luned dat I can jus call Jesus and he can make me feew betta all da time.
Me: Yes Bella. That’s right.
Bella: Momma, can I climb up on my table and jump off of it?
Me: No Bella, you can’t climb up on your table and jump off of it. You might hurt yourself.
She pauses…Then looks up at the ceiling and yells
Bella: Jeeeeeeesuuuuuuuus…..JEEEEEEEEESUUUUUUUUUUS. I’m wite hew! I wanna climb up on my table and jump off of it Jesus! My Momma said no to me Jesus! Can I jump off of my table please!!
She pauses again and then looks at me…
Bella: Jesus said I can climb up on my table and jump off it Momma.
Me: Oh he did huh? Well I didn’t hear him.
Bella: He whispered Momma.
Me: Whatever Bella. No jumping.
Bella: Shhhhh, you can’t say dat to me now. Jesus is sleeping now. So don’t say anyheen else to me. He needs some west.
Wear it Proud Baby. Wear it Proud.
February 26, 2009
It was Tuesday when it all started. Walking through the lobby to check Bella in for Pre-School another mom from the class asks me one question…
Is your train for the parade ready yet?
What? Train for what parade? Oh, we must have missed that since Bella had been out of school since Valentine’s Day and I didn’t have her folder with all of the upcoming events of CTCC Pre-School. I go to her class, take a sneak peek into her folder to find one simple sheet of paper that I skim however I pick up on the key points…Make a train car with your child….Let them do the work…Get creative…Got it! No problem, it wasn’t due until Thursday. I got plenty of time!
Wednesday: Ok, what are we going to use for a train car for Bella to wear at school? Um, I know! We have that box that my laptop came in. That will be perfect! Hmmmm, what else…Oh great! I have that old apron that I can cut the ribbon ties off of and those can be the straps! Awesome! Man, I am hitting all the points here. Handmade and creative. I am such a great Mom. Maybe next year I will try to be a Room Mom, maybe in a few years PTA? Who knows!
I grab a kitchen knife and start to hack away at a Dell box covered in shipping labels. Bella is next to me beaming with excitement. Seeing her so happy I decide, she needs some wheels. We aren’t doing this thing halfway baby! I grab a small trashcan and trace the bottom of it on a piece of leftover box. Boom, 4 wheels baby! I am on a roll! We get out the markers and she gets going making her perfect little creation to parade around in with her friends the next day. I am feeling like the best Mom ever. Wait, girl we need to kick this thing up a notch…I know, I have some red, yellow and blue files folders!! Let’s color on those and you can glue them to your train! “Great Idea MOMMA!” She yells with excitement.
This morning the train was finished. I was so proud. She was so excited. It’s time to make our grand entrance kid. The car ride to the church was awesome. We hop out of the car, grab Bella’s little back pack and “Don’t foget my bootiful twane Momma!” Got it babe. Let’s go.
In the lobby I see one or two tiny little trains walking to class. Then a few more. I am now starting to see a theme here…
Wow, that one’s pretty cool.
Geez, did you see that thing?
Man, that Thomas the train looks even better than the one on TV!
Holy crap, is that card board or mahogany?
Ok, fake smoke, now that’s impressive.
I wonder how long it took to spell your entire name out in tiny rhinestones down the side of that thing?
But these aren’t in the same classes that are doing the parade with Bella right? Like this has to be something different…right? Wrong Mom.
It hits me. I glance down to my little girl in her Dell Box with the shipping label on the side half covered by a piece of red file folder…Oh no. No no no. I am not that Mom. She is NOT that kid! No! As the little engines and cars pass by my heart begins to sink…it’s true. Lord please don’t let her notice…
I will say this. My life is one that seems to be a constant stream of mistakes and instances of embarrassing myself. At least I can laugh about it. So I just began to laugh. I laughed and laughed. I cried for a second but I don’t think anyone saw. I was glad I didn’t have a camera since I hadn’t quite decided if I should record this memory for her or if it would scar her for life. She was in her classroom getting ready to be paraded through the church lobby and each and every one of the classrooms. She was still so excited. I had planned to leave after dropping her off to run some errands, but No No. We are in it together kid. Now you wear that Dell box the best you can wear it baby. Let’s go.
I walked beside her every step of the way. Class after class. Mom’s lined the hallways. There were a few looks here and there as if to say ‘Oh, look at that poor little girl. She must have found that one the side of the road on the way to school. Maybe they need to talk to the church about getting some Benevolence funds’. Deep down I was hoping she wouldn’t notice that she looked different. But after all, it said let your kid make their train. My kid make a freakin train and we were gonna ‘Choo-Choo’ all the way to the bank baby. We rounded the last corner and there was Andy. He made it perfect. The over exaggerated look of happiness and pride on his face caught her eye and suddenly she was beaming.
She wore that train. She wore it proud and rocked her tiny pink Converse as well.
And I promised her ice cream after school.
She Strikes Again
February 19, 2009
You have to love the honesty of little kids. Bella has had a terrible cough all week this week so I have kept her out of childcare for 3 reasons: Not to infect someone else. Not to infect her with anything new. Not to be the Mom who takes their kid to childcare while they are hacking, gagging and coughing their little lungs out. So needles to say I have had her with me on my errands this week. Yesterday we were in the new Kroger (Love it!!) in the frozen food section. I was carefully scoping out which frozen veggies were the ones in the 10 for $10 special as Bella sat patiently in the cart. The next 5 minutes were awesome in a super embarrassing/hilarious kind of way. Here is the scene: Frozen food aisle. 3 or 4 people all within a few feet of one another. 2 Kroger employees restocking the Lean Cuisines.
Incident#1:
There was a woman who was on her cell phone who decided to move our cart out of her way rather than going around it. Bella then proceeds to tattle:
“Momma! That guwl moved my basket!”
“It’s ok Bella, you are fine.”
“No Momma, dat big guwl wite dayer on da phone (as she is pointing) moved my basket an she was naughty to me!!”
“Bella, you do not say that. You are just fine.”
“Momma, she needs a spankin…”
I give her “the look” and she hangs her head quietly.
Incident#2:
After getting in trouble for shouting at the lady who moved our cart (which by the way who moves someone else’s cart with their kid in it anyway??), Bella raises her head just in time to notice a man standing a few feet away. His arms are covered in tattoos. He waives at Bella since she is obviously staring him down.
“Momma, dat boyee said hi to me.”
“That’s nice Bella. It’s ok to say hi back to him.”
She waives.
“Momma, whats on dat boyees awms wite dayer?”
At this point I am getting nervous about what is coming next.
“That is paint Bella. Those are called tattoos and sometimes big people get them painted on their skin.”
I knew this guy was listening to me. I have no idea why I said what I said next but I did. Maybe I was trying to let him know that I don’t have a problem with tattoos at all. Maybe I just didn’t want him to think I was an uptight conservative. Maybe I just wanted him to think I was cool. Anyway, again I don’t know what I was thinking.
“Bella, Uncle Bubba (my brother) has one of those (he does on his back).”
This was the wrong road to go down…
“No he doesn’t Momma. Unka Bubba does not have dat paint. He has showas (showers) and heez awms is clean and dey don’t have dat paint on dem like dat boyee does.”
“Bella, yes Uncle Bubba does have paint on him. But it is one his back.”
“I hink dat boy needs a baftubby and heez Momma needs to wash him off.”
“Thank you Bella. You are done. Anymore questions you have you need to whisper them to me please.”
Incident #3:
At this point I am heading out of the frozen foods section hoping to keep her moving and unable to study anyone else for too long. A man who was restocking some sort of frozen item is the last person for us to pass. I am not sure where this one came from. Maybe she was making it up, maybe she wasn’t. Either way it was really embarrassing.
We pass the man.
“Momma, dat big boyee tooted.” (Fake forced laugh follows).
“Bella, don’t say that.”
“No Momma. Dat boyee wite dayer jus tooted! (Fake forced laugh follows) An I hink it might be stinky!” (Fake forced laugh follows)
All I am thinking is get her out of here, get her out fast. As we round the corner, there is one final insult she feels the need to deliver…she lifts her tiny hand and begins to waive it infront of her nose…
“Shoooooo-Weeeeee Momma!”
We make our escape and as I am wheeling away from the humiliation I just had to laugh at her. I couldn’t help but appreciate how smart she is, how funny she is, how innocent she is and how so much can come out of someone so tiny. I get the feeling she is going to be like her Daddy…
For Big Girls Only
February 16, 2009
There we were. Standing in the little girl section at Wal-Mart. Surrounded by shirts covered in Hannah Montana and jeans with holes already torn in them that cost $25 even at the low-cost bargain giant superstore. Yet we were not there for overpriced tween attire. No, no. We were there for Panties.
As I weave the basket through the racks of cheesy clothes I am watching the face of my little girl so filled with anticipation for the upcoming event that she could barely contain herself. Infact, she did not contain herself as we were greeted at the door by your typical elderly Wal-Mart employee who stands to check receipts to make sure your not stealing anything (and by the way, why do they always put older people up there to do that job? I mean let’s have the sweet old lady deal with the potential shop lifters? I say just pay the to let them walk around and just be nice to people all day. But that’s just me…).
“Hello young lady. How are you today?”
“Good. I am going to get some pannees fo my bottom. But not as big as Momma’s. She bottom is bigger dan mine is.”
I have to admit, as she stood at the giant display of little girls panties I did grab my phone to snap a few pictures as I watched Bella carefully study each package before making her decision. My child is not one to rush. She likes to study everything and will patiently wait until she sees exactly what she knows she wants to make her decision. So where are we today?
Day # 6
No Accidents.
Big Girl Panties (Dora and The Little Mermaid) In Full Effect.
Used the public toilet for the first time TODAY.
Awesome.
However, please do not ask me for any tips as it did indeed take me almost 6 months.
Why can’t I go to school Momma?
February 12, 2009
The answer to this question is not because it is not a good school The Pre-School at Crosstimbers is great! It is not because Bella doesn’t like school. She breaks out into tears weekly when I have to explain to her that not everyday is a school day. It is not because crazy ice storms or tornadoes have shut the doors. Even though weather has gotten in the way a few times, here in North Texas in February we are looking at yet another month of mostly sunshine and 60-70 degree weather.
So what is it that haunts me in the back of my mind causing to randomly keep Bella out of childcare and spend the rest of the day feeling guilty about it?
The stomach bug.
We battled this nasty virus back in November. Actually beginning 12 hrs. after Andy and I got home from Italy. Something about me you need to know is that with everything in me, I hate to throw up. More than most people hate it…I truly hate it. Having my kid who has never had a fat roll of any sort in her life therefore can’t really afford to be puking her guts out, sprawled out on the floor (since I do not let pukers sit on the furniture) waiting to see if she can hold down the Gatorade that Andy ran to the gas station to get…Need I say how miserable that is? I will say that since the incident in November there has been no further Tilly contamination. However, with every stomach ache from too much ice cream I anxiously wait to see if it is really the ice cream or if it is really that nasty little bug trying to make its home in my little girls belly.
So she is back at school. As we speak I hope that no virus has found it’s way into her little body. But even if it does I will say, I know she had a great day and I know she loved every minute of it. So I guess I need to get over it.
The Terrible Truth…
February 11, 2009
I don’t want to say it…I especially don’t want to write it…but in my heart I know I need to.
I have not done my best.
For my husband. For my family. For my daughter. For myself.
I don’t know when it all happened. I think it was a slow progression when certain things I used to hold as very important to keep in order slowly didn’t seem so important anymore. I am not a bad wife. I am not a bad mother. I hope I am not a bad friend. I just want to be my best. Not The best. That would be impossible. My best.
Taking care of my house as a treasured gift to have. Supporting and loving my husband no matter what his response or lack there of may be and holding him at all times in respect for the man, friend and leader that he is. Investing and soaking up every precious moment with my little girl who with every short tempered word I may speak when frustration sets in holds just as much if not more value to her than every love filled I Love You that I give her.
I feel the need to admit that more often than I want to think I have taken advantage of all I have been given. I thnk we all do. But I don’t want to be that way anymore. You never know when the things you treasure most will change or possibly not be yours to treasure any longer. I want to fully embrace each moment as a gift, making the most out of each and every opportunity and I just haven’t been living that way.
So what have I done to change that? I made a list. A list of things that I know are important to my husband, to my daughter, to others I care for and also to myself. Some of the things on my list are things I am excited to do, while others are not easy for me to do nor do I necessarily want to do them. But at the end of the day, they are things that I need to do and I know that the outcome of being diligent in them all come back to one thing: Doing the absolute best with what I have been given. All of which I do not deserve. Strange to be excited about getting some more discipline in my life…I guess that’s how you know God is up to something.
What the heck?
February 6, 2009
In the Tilly house we happen to be of the opinion that the DVR (Digital Video Recorder) is one of greatest things ever. Due to our love of this technological masterpiece, we hardly ever watch anything live anymore, but rather record it in advance and watch it at our leisure. Another beautiful thing about this is the ability to avoid having to watch any commercials whatsoever. Awesome.
So the other day I had the TV on in the back ground while I was working on the couch on my computer. The TV was in Live Mode since it was serving more of a purpose for background noise as Bella played hard at her talent show with Angelina Ballerina when I heard a commercial come on that made me really, really mad. Really.
The Plan B Pill.
Ok so there’s a pill out there that can stop a pregnancy. Got that. I am sure that hospitals and doctors have been giving them to young girls and women for years. I am of the opinion that a baby is a baby and that there is never a reason to end an innocent life (unless you intentionally kill someone and then I think that you should get the death penalty immediately…but that is a whole nother post). However being the somewhat liberal person that I am, I also understand that someone such as a rape victim or a woman who is caught in a physically abusive marriage may choose the option of a pill to end a possible life conceived in such a terrible and violent way. (By the way, once again I don’t think it is right so I am not saying that.) Anyway, ok that pill exists. BUT LET’S MAKE A FREAKIN TV COMMERCIAL ABOUT IT AND MAKE IT AVAILABLE TO ANYONE??? Seriously? Let’s show a college girl in a drug store with a sad look on her face looking at this small box with hope it will make it all ok and think that the message that sends is ok? I will tell you the message it sends: Hey girls, don’t worry about stopping yourself from getting drunk at the frat house party down the street and definitely don’t stop yourself from sleeping with that dude that you hardly even know. Don’t worry about getting any kind of diseases or how crappy you are going to feel tomorrow about yourself. Just worry about having any consequences from your series of bad decisions. Aka…getting pregnant. I am not claiming to have a perfect rack record in my life. Far, far from it. Yet, I am a firm believer in personal responsibility for our decisions.
Yes, I am a Christian and my views of what is right and wrong or good or bad for us is formed from what the guidelines that God set out for us say. But let’s even take that out of the equation and say what this does to the concept of personal responsibility as a human being in general. Christain or not. I think that this 60 second commercial is a slap in the face and an encouragement for even more of a lack of stepping up and owning your decisions. What’s next, an ad campaign based around the invention of a computer chip that can be implanted in your brain that’s purpose is to eliminate having a conscious or any shred of personal accountability for the decisions you make? What the heck.
